Sometimes it's hard to be a woman...

yes it is a knitted womb from www.knitty.com pattern fans
Grrr...

I've just woken up with eeeevil period pain. To be fair I haven't exactly "just" woken up - I more or less woke up at 1ish and now can't get back to bastarding sleep. It feels as though I have an anvil crushing my innards and some mad leprechaun things knocking seven shades of shite out of my lumbar regions. I'm not going to mention any other effects in order not to offend anyone's delicate sensibilities...

& I say "get back to... sleep", but really I've been drowsing, tossing and turning for a couple of hours - fun, fun, fun- and my bed now looks like a heap of discarded rags. Most relaxing and appealing. No position I lie in is helping - and the smallest crumb of comfort is that at least I'm not waking anybody up and thus making myself feel guilty. Having said that, having someone to moan to, cling on to and treat as a human hot water bottle would be nice... but that's just selfish.

Recently, I've not been finding it easy to get to sleep anyway - the not having a job thing has been weighing on my mind. It's not just the lack of money, but the total lack of routine that is getting to me. I also have a fear that I'm unemployable and the more I worry about it, the less I sleep and the more my semblance of a routine falls apart. The past few weeks have been chaotic enough without my body being in rebellion too. Bah. Bloodyfannyingbastardshittingfuckfacebollockypisswankinghell.

*sigh*

I don't even have a hot water bottle or heat pad (not that that would do any good: I don't have a microwave to heat it in either) and ibuprofen don't even touch the sides of the "discomfort" (I am refusing to really call it pain - I've had dental surgery where the anaesthetic has worn off before the procedure was finished: that was pain...feeling every last suture and not being able to do a damn thing about it but count from one to ten over and over again *shudder* Happy memories. I'm not sure I'll ever be able to watch Marathon Man again. Not that I'd want to, but I'm sure you get the point). Camomile tea and lounging about until it subsides seem to be the only options open to me...

Grrr...

Sometimes it's hard to be a woman? No shit, Sherlock. I'm almost looking forward to menopause. No, really...

5 comments:

c'lam said...

not having a job is rubbish. and apart from anything else you have to keep filling in application form, which is beyond rubbish.

ugh.

beans said...

Hello from the states!

I know how yucky period pains can be. I have a condition called PCOS, so I wouldn't get mine if I wasn't on the pill. About every three months I get a period, but they feel like my insides are being hacked out with little gardening rakes-My partner has no sympathy for me as she gets hers regularly.

I appreciated your detailed account of what your pains feel like. I do hope you are feeling better soon.

As for the job thing, don't be so hard on yourself. Not sure what the situation is-but try and hang in there :)

Jules said...

Anesthetics often wear off (or don't work at all) with me too. Have you tried 3 Anadin Extras? That usually works for me, at least...

Hope you're feeling okay now.

straighttalker05 said...

I always imagined mine would get easier when I got older.

I can report they have gotten worse.

They did not tell me that in Mizz. LIES!

30-Something said...

I can't wait for menopause too. In fact, I wish someone would just take it out completely, it's not like I need it. And could use the space to store stuff, like a handy, little cupboard.